Hello? Are you there?

I think I need another wire to connect with Him because, well, this one must be broken.... Hello?  Can you hear me?  Maybe if I get down on my knees I can get a better reception...  

There has been a lot going on in my life the past month or so.  I sometimes feel like I am spinning out of control and cannot find the handle to hold on to that will slow me down.  I know that He is trying to get my attention but the busyness of life is blocking the call.  It's like I'm on one side of the street and I hear Him, but just as I look, a big honking bus drives by and blocks my view.  So I keep walking down the street, in the wrong direction, clueless of my surroundings and the danger I am in.  Oh but for the grace of God and His mercy to keep me from getting into too much trouble.   

I'm reminded of Malia...  I tell her to stop doing something… and she says "OK" (so I know she hears me!) all the while continuing to do what she is being told to stop doing… I tell her again, in a little sharper tone to my voice…. And she says "OK, mommy"  and all the while continuing what she is doing… By the third time, I am getting angry because she is not listening to me.  "Seriously, Malia... I said STOP!" and the butt bumping begins...   Sigh... not unlike me and Daddy God....

I guess you are probably tired of hearing me whine and moan about how I know where I need to be, I just don't go there.  People, let me tell you, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak... I get that analogy now.... I never understood it before...but I do now!   I WANT to be back where I was before with Him..... but it's like there is a big claw on my head turning me away from there.  That claw has been there for years.  I use to be stronger and able to fight against it.  Right now, it appears that claw is stronger than I.  What do I need to do to be able to fight back? 


Clearly, I'm doing a lot of things wrong...  I need to be stronger, and need to listen closer... I have noticed that of late I am bored with the online things that have caught my eye previously.... could it be that He is trying to get me to get back in His Word?  It has been quite a while... I think I may give that a try this evening and see.... 

 Psalm 23 (King James Version)

1The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. 3He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

4Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. 5Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. 6Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.

Need to make some changes....

Well... we did it!  We are buying a new to us car.  We have been so cramped in our little Accent with Malia getting bigger.  My knees have a special place in the dash board on the passenger side....

If you know me, you know that I do NOT like to incur debt.  But alas, there was no other way....   My BFF is getting a new car and she is going to sell me her old one.  YIPPEE!!!  My knees will be able to move!!!  OH NO... I have incurred a commitment to a loan... what if... what if... what if...

So.... Last night, as I went to bed, it was on my mind ... but I feel better about it today.  I had a dream... first one that I can remember in a long time (I used to have them often).... in my dream I was in a church (actually it was my mom's church, sort of) and I could hear someone saying to me... Sing your praise to God and it will be ok ... So I give all glory to God for placing this opportunity in our hands.  He knew our needs and he opened a door for us.  He will provide!!